Thursday, January 20, 2011

Selecting A Southern California Wedding Officiant - Tip 1 - Real Life Stories of Couples Picking A "Fake" or "Internet Ordained" Wedding Officiator!

January 20th 2011 - Continuation “Value” Starting Tip One – Selecting a Wedding Officiator or Marriage Minister For Your Southern California Wedding Ceremony – By Dr. Linda Wainwright Trott – The Clergy Network – A Wedding Officiator Referral Membership Network

What Can Happen If The Wedding Officiator Is Not ValuedThree Examples Of A Couple’s Imagined Wedding Day Nightmares Come True In Real Life ! In our previous Blog entry, we talked briefly on the “Importance of Valuing The Role of The Wedding Officiator”. Here are only a few “real-life” scenarios of what does happen when the Officiator is haphazardly selected without informed decision.
                                                                Scenario One 
                                     Waiting For Something Better To Come Along

The Wedding Officiator did not show up on the wedding day – Why? - The bride and groom picked him/her based on price! What they did not know is that the Officiator bought their license to preside marriage ceremonies from on-line - Their titles were fake, the authority to marry real, but this was his/her “pocket change” profession. Not taking their own role as “Wedding Officiator” seriously, they get a more financially lucrative job position and simply drop the presiding of weddings. “How could they do this? …… Simply because officiating is not their chosen career! Consequently, they did not invest time, money, energy and years to training in the profession! It was in their “self interest” to take the more lucrative job offer, and that was not found in presiding weddings!


If lucky enough to find out before the wedding day, the couple is forced to find an Officiator at the last minute – they are stuck with who is available, and that is exactly who shows up. Someone who doesn’t know the bride and groom, and is just as “fake” a Wedding Officiator as the one who dropped them in the first place. It only gets worse from there!
                                Scenario 2
               Wedding Officiator Brokerage

The Wedding Officiator sent someone else to preside the marriage ceremony – Why? -The couple’s selected Wedding Officiator was only “perceived” to be that. In fact, the Officiator may was running a “Wedding Officiator Brokerage”. In short, they book the weddings, don’t perform those which provide a lesser financial gain, and farm the rest out for a rather large commission.

The one who shows up is a disaster, getting the groom’s or bride’s name wrong. They forget to include something that the couple wanted in the ceremony wording. Perhaps, doesn’t even preside the ceremony wording that the couple was expecting. It can get worse from there!
Scenario 3

The Las Vegas Drive-Through Wedding Officiant

The Wedding Officiator does not provide a contract, talking only by phone with the couple, and does not write the wedding ceremony wording with them. Even if meeting with the couple, it is a quick interview, but the price is right! Not much work is really required for a brief wedding ceremony? Right?

It is not uncommon for “fake” or Internet Ordained Wedding Officiators to work on “volume”. Promising a 15 minute or so marriage ceremony, but actually presiding a careless 3 – 8 minute version- A sort of marriage ceremony on “Speed”!


Upon wedding day arrival, the Wedding Officiator will most probably be late, possibly disheveled due to rushing about, not certain as to the bride’s or groom’s name, and in a big hurry to get to the next wedding. In short, sloppy all around service! He/She may even give the Marriage License to the Event Planner or a parent of the bride or groom, telling them to file the same (It is actually the Officiator’s legal responsibility to file the license with the State of California). You see, these types of Marriage Officiants operate on “volume”. They are actually scheduling a wedding every ½ to an hour, and always running behind. They charge less and provide a flawed and inattentive service to the bride and groom – Perhaps performing as many as 8 – 10 events per wedding day! Sheer craziness!

About this writer – Dr. Linda Wainwright Trott is a multi-degree Wedding Officiator in Southern California. Dr. Linda of “Ask Dr. Linda” has academically and experientially trained Wedding Officiators in University, and contributed to the National and International advancement of “Wedding Ceremony” wording and related education of the bride, groom and other wedding professionals. The Clergy Network, Dr. Trott’s officiator membership group, writes and presides marriage ceremonies in Southern California and world-wide.

          Up Coming Blog Entries On Southern California Wedding Officiants

The Clergy Network will continue this series by showing the importance of the role of a Wedding Officiator, and “why” it is in the bride’s and groom’s best interest to value the professional presiders contribution before the day, on the wedding day, and after the solemnization of the ceremony .

Some Definitions:

*An “Officiant” or “Officiator” is the person who has the legal right and geographical jurisdiction to preside a marriage ceremony. An “Officiant or Officiator” may be a Priest, Clergy, Rabbi, Justice of the Peace, Non-Denominational Clergy or other type of minister. So, the term refers to the position of authority (an official duty or function), to do a certain thing. In the case of a wedding to preside over the solemnization of the marriage, and to file the marriage license for recording.

*Solemnization – The performing of the legal marriage ceremony in the presence of witnesses by a duly appointed official.




Copyright- The Clergy Network – Can not be used without expressed written permission - 2011

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